Smiling Heart

Well, significant others, I guess I've reached my decision on the whole deal with being the one who is truly in charge of running the household:  it's always going to be your job.  

In consulting with another person in my situation, this person basically said that they gave up.  A long time ago.  Because their spouse is never going to change, you can't change them, and even when they do get the bright idea that they are going to "help", it causes more harm than help most times.  

So, I give up.  I can only do what I can do.  No one comes in my house until  I'm ready.  If my husband doesn't like that, then he needs to change.  Until then, which is probably never, I am doing what I can do, which most days is very little, since the amount that needs to get done is so monumental.

But, hey, I have learned that hiring out is nothing to sneeze at.  And, I think my husband knows better than to ask why, or how much, or can we afford it.  Because if he does, and has any kind of attitude of "why can't you do it", I will probably push him down the stairs.  

It has been worth paying someone else to mow the lawn when last year, it brought me to tears trying to find the time and strength to do it.  This year, that worry is nonexistent.  I don't even think about the lawn.  It is so great that I don't even notice when last year (and in other years past), every time I got home, my heart was stressing over it.

It has been worth paying someone else to help me finish remodeling a bedroom upstairs.  Yes, I will pay you by the hour to come and help me move books and furniture and to sand the floor.  Know why?  Because it will never get done if I am expected to do it myself.  

Do we have financial problems?  Yes.  Can I still justify paying someone for these things?  Yes.  Because they are not costing any more than 3-4 meals at a fast food restaurant, and to my aching, stressed out heart, it's worth it.  And, it should be worth it to my husband too - because if my health goes in the tank, we are both screwed.  Not even because he loves me, but just for that practical reason.  

So, significant others, give up on your partners if they are reluctant to follow a pattern of cleanliness.  They will not change unless they want to, and let's face it - how many of us will ever really change the way we are?  We can hope and pray, but until that day comes, just give up, do what you can, and ignore their negligence.  Your heart will be much healthier.

Clinging to the Savior (no, not Obama!)

I'm studying the red letters.  Just the words of Christ in the Bible.  I want to know what He really said.  I am at the point in my walk that I want to ask, "What else matters?"  

I got some of my answers yesterday.  I had a few questions about the sermon on the Mount.  It was explained by my pastor that if you look at that particular text as a checklist of things to do, so you can be ... I must paraphrase because I can't recall the word he used ... but I'm just going to say "righteous", then you might as well pack it up and go home.  Jesus used the sermon on the Mount to show us, here's the law, here's how inadequate you are, here's how to get to heaven - ME!  

So, today, I'm thinking (and this will probably change because that's just how I am) ... what other words matter in this day and age except those that Christ said?  If we would just hold onto that and follow through with striving towards Him and His Kingdom, a lot of what we go through would be like gravy, if we would only compare it to the damnation we deserve.  After all, what was the cross, a stroll in the park?  

I know we need God's Word as a whole, but just for simplicity's sake, what if we took those red letters and just followed them?  I am fearful that in doing what I THINK I'm supposed to be doing as a Christian is really going to send me to the harshest judgment by the Boss.  When I read what Jesus has to say, I think today's church is so RIDICULOUSLY FAR OFF; how can we even think we are going to win any souls to heaven with the meaningless lives we are leading?  Why are we allowing the churches to lead us down the road to hell?  Because I believe many of them are.  We are a stale people who don't have a clue.  I think we're all doing the opposite of what Jesus wants and we're letting church politics excuse it all.  

Jesus said He came here to divide, and that is what will happen to us - only in this society, I'm afraid those with the most gadgets and technological know-how are going to be the ones that the mindless listen to, because people are too lazy to read the red letters for themselves.  They are going to listen to the ones who paraphrase and diminish those words, shaping them into a neat little pamphlet that doesn't offend anyone.  But, good luck with those red letters not offending anyone.  Thank God, Jesus was the Son who was and is and is to come - because you know what?  He didn't have to take anyone's crap.  But what's more?  In the end, he took it all, so we wouldn't have to walk about whining all the time about how someone scratched our car in the parking lot.  WHO CARES, you mindless dummy?!  

Think about this, if for no other reason we should be concerned about this.  If no one calls these people out on the carpet and tells them why these things are so significant and tells them what IS significant, how else will we ever get their attention?  Who's going to pay at the judgment seat when God wants to know why all these souls are in hell?  Read the Word.  We are.